The Truth

BY: DR. FOREST LEWIS

 

Get ready America, because you are going to have a Democrat in the White House in 2009, whether you want to or not!

How do I know? John McCain is just as much of a Democrat as Barack Obama is, that's how I know!

At least Obama will admit to being a Democrat. John McCain, one of the biggest phonies to come down the pike in some time, is telling everyone willing to waste their time listening to him, that he is a, "Conservative Republican."

If McCain is a Conservative Republican, then, well, I'm "Santa Claus, Damn It."

Since Santa Claus is a wonderful fictional character, I know, there is no way that I can be this person. Taking this argument to its logical conclusion, there is no way that "Juan McCain Is A Conservative Republican."

Although I strayed from my Southern Conservative roots for a short period, I know what a Conservative is, and John McCain isn't a likeness of "True" Conservatism. He has been going around the country, promising voters everything, but the kitchen sink. But, give him time, because we are early in the campaign season. Before it is all said and done, I expect that he will offer up "Not Only His Kitchen Sink, But His First Born" in order to be our next President.

McCain put on a disgusting performance while delivering a speech in Columbus, Ohio recently. By the way, am I the only one who can't stand to hear that whiney, little monotone voice of his? Am I the only one who is sick of hearing, "My Friends." Hey John, "I'm Not Your Friend."

A friend is difficult to come by. We all have tons of aquaintances, but very few friends. However, with McCain, "Everyone Is His Friend."

This should be your first clue to get away from this panderer, as far as humanly possible. He tries so hard. As a result, his reaching out to Americans is seen as McCain saying, "Hey, I Ain't Got No Shame, I'll Kiss Anyone's Butt, If That's What It Takes To Become President."

In his patronizing speech, "Juan" beat out "Puxataney Phil" as a prognosticator. At least, I can give Phil a pass when he gets the weather wrong. Hell, he's a damn rodent!

McCain predicted that by 2013, with him as President of course, "The Iraq War Will Be Won." However, as he gazed into the future, "Wizard McCain" said that the Taliban would still be in Afghanistan, and will continue to be a threat to our freedom. But Iraq noted "The Wizard," would be well under control by the end of his first term!

Wait a minute. Isn't McCain one of those who has said, "You Can't Put A Timetable On When We Will Be Out Of Iraq?"  That putting a timetable on our departure would simply embolden the insurgents, and all they would need to do is wait for us to leave?

Now that he's runnng for President, McCain is hoping that you forgot this trivial information, because he plowed on:

"By January 2013, America has welcomed home most of the servicemen and women who have sacrificed terribly so that America might be secure in her freedom"

I think this is when I felt like "Throwing Up." I get so tired of these guys(That Includes Hillary) who think we are "Mental Midgets," and they can feed us the typical inane bull. And we will all flash that big "Colgate Smile," and say, "Thank You, I'm Brain Dead, Here's My Vote."

One of the things that I learned as a young broadcaster years ago, was to delivery the news in not only a Mid-Western accent, but to speak to my audience like they were my relatives. In other words, "Be Truthful In My Speaking."

When I hear this little man speaking, I don't believe a damn thing coming out of his mouth. I watch his eyes. He looks like a little animal that has been trapped in a corner. His eyes will repeatedly, dart from left to right. Don't believe so, watch him the next time that he speaks. Also, ask yourself, "Do I Honestly Believe What This Guy Is Saying?" I think that you will come away with a totally different perspective the next time that you listen to "Juan McCain."

Okay, what else did this pretender to "Santa's Home In The North Pole" promise? Here is his wish list:

* Russia and Communist China will join us in "pressuring Iran to abandon its nuclear ambitions,

   and North Korea to discontinue its own

* The Army and the Marine Corps will increase in size, and its efficacy

* Our economy will "Boom"

* The world food crisis will end during "The Wizard's" first term, and we will have low inflation, and a greater

   quality of life

* Americans will enjoy accessible health care, not to be confused with "Universal Health Care" as

   proposed by his  presumed opponent, Barack Obama

* We will be well on our way to "Independence From Foreign Sources Of Oil"

* Social Security will once again be solvent

* We will see a confirmation of "Scores Of Judges" to the federal and appelate courts,

   and "Also The Supreme Court"

* The U.S. will secure its borders with Mexico, and companies will be "Vigorously Prosecuted,"

   if they hire illegal aliens

After giving this speech, "Saint John" ascended into the heavens, "With A Band Of Arch-Angels Accompanying Him!"

I mean, is this guy serious? Does he think we are that damn stupid to believe this nonsense? Please, for your own sanity, re-read the list of promises from John McCain. Russia and China putting the squeeze on Iran to stop its nuclear program? Yeah, Right! These two Commie Countries are praying for our downfall. Why should they help us? Why should they help Israel?

Juan McCain, who tried to ram that "Illegal Amnesty Bill" down the throats of "All" hard working Americans, is now tring to convince us that he will enforce our borders? Surely, this little man was only jesting!

The one that had me on the floor laughing in stiches was the one where he said, "The United States Would be Independent From Foreign Sources Of Oil."

Pray tell oh great "Wizard," how will you pull this one off? McCain's looney friends on the left have stopped us at every turn when America has sought to drill for oil off of the coast of Florida, and in their beloved ANWR. These so-called environmentalists were more concerned about the caribou than they were for human beings. The caribou are thriving, and we are on the precipice of paying more than "FOUR DOLLARS FOR A GALLON OF GAS."

To make matters worse, the Bush administration, according to the Washington Post, will list the "Polar Bears" as an Endangered Species. But, this goes beyond "saving the polars bears," which are not in peril. This action goes right to the heart of the phony argument of global warming. By placing the polar bears on the Endangered Species List, President Bush has now joined with Democrats in saying "Global Warming Is A Fact."

The Republicans are wondering why they are losing Congressional Elections. Hell, they are acting just like, "Socialist Democrats," that's why. Real Conservatives are sick and tired of people like John McCain, and to be truthful, "George Bush."

I saw a wonderful cartoon in my Saturday morning paper. It had the moderator of a debate declaring, "The battle Continues Between These Two in The Party."

There were "Two Juan McCains, Standing At Different Lecterns." One lectern banner read, "Conservative McCain, And The Other Read, Liberal Maverick."

Like I said, either way, we will have a Democrat in the White House in 2009!

At least one of the Democrats is not a "Pandering, Patent Phony!"